YEAR OF THE MOMBIES The "Protect Life Act," recently introduced in Congress, says doctors can let a pregnant woman die if saving her life kills the fetus. Blastocyst = life Fully-grown woman: expendable fetus-mobile!

But if pregnant women don't count among the living... technically that makes them the undead. Pregnant woman: "BABY... WANT... CHUNKY... MONKEY..." Other pregnant woman: "PICK... LES..."

Which raises important legal questions, such as: Do undead baby-incubator zombies need to pay taxes? "Report all W-2 income UNLESS you are but a vessel for an actual human being."

And clearly pregnancy tests will be required at the polls so that only living women vote!" "I'm afraid you'll have to pee on the stick, ma'am, before you can proceed to the voting booth."